My (Extended) Five Minutes of Fame

     I'm in a music video.


     No, I'm not a sexy dancer in the back of a raunchy pop video of some mega famous pop singer.


     And if you've read the previous blog you'd already know that.


     But let's pretend that you haven't and go through the motions.


     Okay, I went to a Linkin Park concert last year. If you haven't already figured it out (Seriously, you haven't. What, do you have one brain cell or something? Sorry ... ) I'm a really big Linkin Park fan. Really big. So when I heard they were planning a concert in England, I was thrilled, excited, rushed, stunned. They never play in England. Never. So the fact they were playing a gig just down the road from me meant fate was at hand. And I went. And I saw loads of cameras. Didn't think much of it, but it turned out my first ever concert and my first ever LP concert was being documented for a DVD. I was hyperventilating when I found out.


     Of course I brought it!


     Anyway, my second ever concert, the infamous Nickelback concert (see previous chapter) also had loads of cameras. I couldn't figure out why, as before, in the LP concert. And then Chad Kroeger announced that their next music video would be "Burn It To The Ground" and it would be a live music video and they were filming it at this concert. I was, again, stunned. It seems like the camera loves me and follows me to my concerts.


     Me and BF were at the front of the crowd. Right at the front. I probably coulda touched the cameraman. Anyway, she screamed so loud I went deaf. I didn't want to be seen looking boring in a video I might star in, so bounced and screamed along.


     Turned out that was the worst possible thing I coulda done, 'cos now I'm on a music video (for less than a second) with my mouth wide open, which is not a good look. The only good thing to come from this is that you can't really tell it's me, unless you know me or I tell you it's me. So my claim to fame is essentially ruined by my slack jaw. 


     Okay, okay, I was mortified at first, but now I think it's a honor to have my mouth wide and open, catching flies, in a Nickelback music video.


     Better to have some of me on it, then none of me.


     And if you're asking, yes, I was at the front of the LP concert too. But no, I'm not of the DVD (or at least, I can't see me) because the camera was less generous with it's panning.


     Plenty of crowd shots, as in, wide shots. Not many close-ups.


     But it's the mere thought of my first concert being on DVD to relive, that makes it worthwhile.

Why I Should Never Get a Train Alone

Nickelback Concert; NIA, Birmingham

26th May, 2009

     I promised you a tale about my very first experiences of a train station, alone. So what the Hell does Nickelback have to do with it, I hear you ask. Okay, my best friend loves them. Absolutely adores them. So when she found out they were bringing their "Dark Horse" tour here, she went insane. She is anyway, but knowing they were going to be in the same country as herself, it sent her loopy. And the only way for her to ever survive this, was for her to go to the concert.


     Nickelback had decided to embrace Birmingham's "National Indoor Arena", which was a train journey away from us. About half an hour to forty-five minutes, give or take. And the date of the gig ended up being on a day when we weren't at Sixth Form (basically school). We got really excited and I sat there amazed that this had stemmed from the birthday gift I gave her.


     It was a homemade CD. I'd put a little Nickelback on there, along with two live tracks from Linkin Park's "Road to Revolution: Live At Milton Keynes" the concert we'd been to, together, the previous year. It was my birthday present and the most amazing day of my life! But I digress.


     Anyway, my dear best friend decided to make this a birthday gift of her own, even though the concert wasn't until May. Now, she comes up with loads of grand plans and I wasn't so sure this was going to occur. Normally, life gets in the way of our plans together ...


     (Bless her. I don't mean anything bad by that. It's just a fact of life.)


     ... so I didn't think this would actually happen. I just nodded and agreed with her as I watched her skip off home.


     Imagine my surprise when she produced tickets and said she would pay for them. I was stunned. Plus, we ended up staying in a motel and she paid for that too. I was in love.


     (KP, I love you!)


     Aaaannnnyyyywaaayyyy ...


     Back to the main point of this story - why I shouldn't be allowed near train stations without adult supervision ...


     Although, technically, I am an adult now. So I could supervise myself, but, still, I suck at train stations.


     Okay, so basically, we were going to Birmingham to see Nickelback. We had gotten a bus to a train station, to be told we needed to get a coach to another, because there was no connecting line from there to Birmingham. So we had tickets for trains/coaches/concerts/hotels. And each other.


     We got to the necessary train station after a lot of messing about and waiting. Waiting is so not fun, when you're all filled up with nervous apprehension and excitement. You just wanna "go, go, go". But we did make it and were left a little confused. Well, I was. I'd never, ever, ever gotten a train on my own and wasn't sure which platform and train we were supposed to be going on. But we walked together to one such platform and waited for a train.


     And that was when it all went wrong.


     Best friend decided to change platform and get on another train to Birmingham. We ran up the stairs and across the bridge and down some stairs to the platform where the train awaited. She ran and jumped on, I hesitated, unsure if it was the train we needed and BAM ...


     The train doors shut.


     I was stood on the platform, staring at my best friend, who was on the train, behind the door, staring at me.


     That was how I stood as the train began to pull away from the platform and head to Birmingham.


     The last thing I saw was my best friend panicking and calling a train attendant down to help her out. Then I saw the train disappear into the far, far, away distance.


     Then I laughed.


     Seriously, now I look back on it, that was a serious sucky situation to be in. I shoulda been scared and crying and stunned. But I wasn't. I found the whole thing rather funny and I laughed. Which is what you normally do upon looking back at said incident.


     I really shoulda been scared, since she had my ticket and the knowledge I needed to get to Birmingham.
 
     And this is exactly the reason I should never, ever, under any circumstance, go to a train station without an adult. 


     Because I hesitate and miss my train.


     Okay, so I was alone on a platform, unaware what that train was, what time the next one was, without a ticket. My phone started vibrating and I answered it, still staring after the Virgin train that had left me behind. Still brain dead. Still laughing.


     "Hello," I said.


     I was greeted with, "Why didn't you get on?"


     "I don't know. The door was closing," I replied, blinking out of my stupor as I heard the panic in BF's voice.


     "What are you going to do? I've got your ticket," she said. It was then I was alerted to the fact I had no ticket.


     "Ah."


     "Go find an attendant or something. I'll talk to someone here. Call me back," and with that, she hung up.


     I looked around the platform and, I am not kidding you, it was empty. Devoid of all life. I walked to the other side of the platform.
 
     Nothing.


     I walked back.


     Nothing.


     Eventually, a Virgin train guy came out of a little office thing and I walked over to him. By then, I had received a text from BF.


     It said: Another train comes in ten minutes.


     I thought, "That's alright then. Better tell someone."


     "Hello," I smiled. "My friend and I have been separated by a train's doors, and she has my train ticket. We're supposed to be going to Birmingham together. Do you know when the next one will arrive?"


     "An hour," he told me.


     I froze and looked at him.


     "An hour. She said ten minutes," I stuttered.


     "No, an hour," and then he pointed to the screen above me, before walking off and leaving me alone.


     I went and sat down, staring glumly at the empty platform, whilst still finding this funny. Secretly. I pulled my phone out and jammed her number in. She picked up on the first ring.


     "Well?"


     "An hour."


     "What's an hour?"


     "An hour to the next train," I stated, flinching as a Fast Train whizzed through the station. "And I still don't have a ticket."


     "I thought he'd give you a new one. He should have," she said.


     "Nah, he walked off and left me."


     "Okay, okay. I'm outside Rugby and I'll be in Birmingham in about half an hour. I'll meet you at the station," she said. "I'll just phone my mum now," she added, before hanging up.


     That was when I realised I had no idea where I was going or what train station I was supposed to get off at.


     I was still in a "finding it funny" stupor.


     I ended up sitting down and reading a revision book on "The Tempest" because my English A-Level exam was coming up soon. Might as well make some good come of this, seeing as I was stuck in a train station and all, and not likely to do much revision later, at the concert.


     An hour later, I had befriended an old lady who was getting on the same train as me. The Virgin had come back too and given me a piece of paper that said I could ride the train. Things were looking up. BF had told me where to go and promised me she'd be waiting, I had a (make shift) ticket and a new FRIEND. Yeah, things were good.


     You'll be relieved to know I made it to Birmingham in one piece, an hour later then BF. And I had a great time at the concert. I might go into more detail at a later date.


     Oh, and whilst reading this, I found out I'm in the "Burn It To The Ground" video, that was filmed at said concert.


     Go to YouTube, type in "Burn It To The Ground" music video and stop at 01:49. You'll see me (the one with her mouth wide open - that's all you can see of me) and my BF (she's the blond).


     I'm in a blue shirt.


     Don't forget to point at laugh at the idiot (me).

Indifferent Confusion

Indifferent Confusion

Hard to ignore,

when I'm down on the floor.

Look the other way,

what's another day?

Brush past the ghosts,

bodies devoid of their hosts.

Shells lay forgotten,

doubt all they've done.

Fighting the current, 

rinsed clean in the torrent.

Try as I might,

but I've lost the light.

Take it away,

fall down and lay.

Watch it run clear,

losing my fear.

Dance in the dark,

make another mark.

Move a little more,

crash through my core.

Words crowd the thought,

and maybe it was caught.

Fade away into bliss,

no one to miss.

Strange Words from a Strange Kid

     Here is some more of the oldy goldy. I posted this on FictionPress and decided to move it here, so the "cleaning out my room" part is from ages ago when I was packing to go to university, as said below. And, as you well know, I've been at university for about five months now, so this is a while back. Enjoy the random thoughts of a ten and twelve year old. 

---

     I was cleaning out my room, today and yesterday, because as you know, I'm off to university in September. And my Mum ordered me to clean out all the things I don't need, in order to better use the space. In other words, I'm being kicked out. Literally. They are chucking out my bed so when I return, I will not have a bed or bedroom. But that's a different matter. Because upon my cleaning, I found two old diaries from when I was younger. I am not kidding you, it was really weird, embarrassing and funny. Which is why I have decided to share a few choice extracts with you.


     Bare in mind, I am eighteen now. Do not hold the stupidity against me.


Extract 1:
Basically the first page of my brand new diary. (I doodled all over it.) Okay, here we go,


24th June, 2001


(Side Note: I have just turned ten years old, as the 24/06 is my birthday)


"For my birthday, I got:

• Tomb Raider III (3)
• Pokemon Gold
• Harry Potter sweets 
• £5 note
• This diary
• A purse
• Two Beanie Babies 

And with the money, I bought, a bag and solitaire!"


     S/N: My life was so cool! I mean, solitaire. You cannot get any cooler than that. And Beanie Babies. TWO BEANIE BABIES! My life was complete back then. Google Beanie Babies if you're unsure. They used to rock my world.


Extract 2:


30th June, 2001
"Today, I had to go to Stephanie's (my sister) school fate. She did a display. I decorated (spelt decarated) a biscuit. It was yummy! Stephanie did pretty well, but she got hurt (HA!) because Catherine stood on her legs."


     S/N: I do love my sister, and do not wish her any harm, in any way. She was just an annoying person back then. Well, she's still annoying, but I am mature enough, and mellow enough, to accept that. Okay, I'm not. I'm lying, so sue me.


Extract 3:


2nd July, 2001


"Went to school (boring) today. Finished a bit early. When I got home, I played Pokemon Gold (ha, caught you out)." 


     S/N: All other entries referred to TRIII, so I was tricking the invisible reader, by playing Pokemon instead of Tomb Raider. Yeah, I was witty back then too.


Extract 4:


4th July, 2001


"No more P.E. until Friday. Yes! But, still got to go to school. Well, better then ... ... watching Football (a bit. Okay, there are worse things)."


Extract 5:


5th July, 2001


"Not boring today. But bad news. Gameboy been taken away until winter. Noooooooo. I can't live without it. It is a long wait."


    S/N: I was, and still am, into video games. But I managed to survive summer without them. My Mum made us play outside in the summer, the horror. Just joking! I have actually got funny memories of playing outside ... 


Extract 6:


8th July, 2001


"Watched CITV, a bit boring. Had hair washed today. Very nice and BOILING HOT. What are they trying to do? Scald me. Make me bald. Man, parents are silly sometimes. They are really, really."


Extract 7:


20th July, 2001


"The summer holidays are here. Fun, fun, fun and just more fun. Hurrah. No more school. Sorry, I might not write anymore."

~~~*~~~

     Okay, that was the first set of extracts from when I was ten years old. The pages were long enough to write more, but my hand writing was way big and filled the whole page. Plus, my attention span at that time (and probably now) was really short. So I would stop writing, or forget about my day before I had time to write it down. Anyway, let's move on to a twelve year old me.

~~~*~~~

Extract 8:


5th March, 2004


"Dear Diary,
today was Friday. Started out fine, in fact, it was perfect (for once). Finished off our group Science project, just need a few more diagrams. English was boring. I'm surprised. I usually love English. Next, I went on Prefect duty. Lucy (yuck) was back at school, and as she was ill, she got to stay in. A real shame. Humanities was fun. I answered a question, for once, and got it right! The second English lesson was boring, again. I got to do extra Prefect duties at lunch. Then Humanities again. Then assembly. After school was my Drama exam. It was late and we only performed half, as the group before us went on for twenty-five minutes. Gave Charlotte a lift home. Taking Steph swimming tomorrow."


     S/N: As you can see, not much difference in content or writing skills! I was still distracted when writing in my diary. If you can even call it that ...


Extract 9:


6th March, 2001


"Dear Diary,
It's Saturday! I woke up to the phone ringing. It was one of Steph's friends. It was 08:00 AM for crying out loud! Watched, 'Dick n Dom in da Bungalow' this morning. Then got washed and dressed and took Steph swimming. Had to walk all the way around. Walked past the school. The car park was empty and the gates padlocked. By the time we got to the Leisure centre, all Steph's friends were already there. Thought about texting Kelly to come, but I didn't. I decided to sit and watch, so I could play with my phone. Saw quite a few people, coming and going. At one, me and Steph left. Got home at quarter past. Had lunch. Played the Sega all afternoon. Had McDonalds for tea. Went upstairs to listen to music. Came down at eight. Wanted to watch a DVD but it was too late. Drank my tea and decided to give up chocolate biscuits. Watched TV for the rest of the evening."


     S/N: I'd just got my first mobile/cell phone for Christmas. I was really chuffed, because it meant I could play Snake. And another side note; McDonalds was a rare occurrence in our house when I was growing up, so having it was like having a Birthday Christmas celebration early.

~~~*~~~

     Ah, good times from my childhood! Aren't they just the most fantastic little gems from my childhood. Don't they just give such a deep and meaningful insight into my mind, which has changed little in six years! 


     ....

Once Upon a Time

     Once upon a time there was a sixteen year old called Kirsty and she wrote a crazy load of posts on a website called Quizilla about the murder of potatoes, the betrayal of teachers and the fear of learning to drive upon the impending turn of her seventeenth year. And this is what she wrote ...


May 9, 2008


The Tale Of Fred and His Murder


About two seconds ago I mentioned a potato murder and yet, I forgot to mention it. Maybe I was too angry to add it but, better yet, I believe that Fred - the victim - deserves a tribute. Fred was my close alien potato friend and yes, I know, I might have known him only ten minutes but he was extremely close to me.


I went into Biology on Thursday as usually, expecting to finish my coursework which is of course, an experiment. We were using potatoes as a source of catalase, an enzyme. I was feeling sorry for the potatoes and went to the bag with a heavy heart, for I had to kill one. That was when I met Fred.


He was there in an abnormal shape, sort of like a sterotypical alien head and he had an eye which was closed. I instantly took him as my own. I showed all my friends this amazing potato. Then I left him alone as I went to get my equipment.


That's when it happened.


Craig killed Fred. With a borer.


I returned and found that Fred my dear friend had a hole in his head. I was horrified and hit Craig instantly and he replied that I was crazy. I mourned Fred and told the murderer to shut up and then my wonderful Biology teacher threatened to shove a borer ... well you get the idea.


I am grieving still.


And yes, this did happen last Thursday and I should be over it, but I'm not.


And yes, I am receiving psychiatric help weekly and I am on medication.


So everything will be fine.

     Ah, good times. It was great to look back over that and remember that day. I love looking back over old memories. Poor Fred. He had a family to provide for, children to see after work, a wife to love ... and his life was cruelly snatched from him. Ah, sorrow for his children and wife. Anyway, I will post an old ramble of mine on a new blog every couple of days so we can laugh at how crazy I was - and still am, I guess. 

Conversion of the Converted

     It's official. I am now a hater of all things "half-term", more generally "term breaks". Because you know what. They suck.


     Okay, I had an awesome Study Week for all reasons non-studious and all that jazz. But that's just it. I did no work and now I'm behind and have three and a half days to jam out another essay, one that seems impossible at the best of times but is increasingly looking worse as the seconds slip by. All because my self-esteem took a lovely hit in the, already tender, ego. Ironically, my next assignment is about self-esteem. Anyway, what makes this essay harder to wrap one's mind around is the fact I'm all out of routine and sync from the week I had off. I can't get my flow.


     I said before Study Week swung around that I did not want a Study Week. I wanted a normal week where I could work as I had been and then go home on Thursday afternoon for my Dead By Sunrise concert (freakin' awesome - see more details later!) on the Friday and then do a little work on Saturday. As life goes, Study Week came whether I wanted it to or not, I went home a little earlier and the internet at home wasn't working. Dead By Sunrise were still freakin' awesome, however, and the highlight of my whole life.


     So, here I sit, cup of tea and pile of paper beside me, feeling increasingly more anxious as I stare at the work I need to get done, feel I can't get done, and feel will be crap no matter what I do. Thanks a lot world. Thanks a lot life. Thanks a lot my stupid procrastination gene. You make me feel crap.


     On a positive note, Supernatural is back for a sixth season, Pokemon Gold/Silver has been remade and I just got a £320 bursery. Oh, and I got to shake Chester Bennington's hand but more of that later!